"The Whole Megillah"

After taking a few weeks off from posting, I'm glad to report that I'm back…just in time for Purim!  I think over the years I've made pretty clear that Purim and I do not mesh well together.  Perhaps because of that, every year I feel obligated to find some way to connect with this holiday that otherwise doesn't really resonate with me.  I call it, "The Purim Challenge."

Here's this year's point of connection!

One of the mitzvot of Purim is hearing Megilat Esther read aloud, once on the Eve of Purim, and once on Purim day.  The catch is, in order to fulfill the mitzvah, you must hear every word of the Megillah--if you miss even one word, you haven't fulfilled your obligation.  Now, on any given Shabbat, if you miss a word here and there from the public Torah reading, it's no big deal.  So, what does this Purim stringency teach us?

In her article, "Every Inch Counts," Sara Debbie Gutfreund explains that the obligation to hear every word in Megilat Esther teaches us that every small step in our lives has meaning.  The Purim story is one that develops incrementally.  Hashem does not swoop in and save the day through magnificent miracles; instead, Esther and Mordechai have to carefully plot out their course of action, step by tiny step.  Last year, I wrote about Esther-Vashti dichotomy and explored why Vashti, brave rebel though she was, ultimately failed to effect change, while demure Esther succeeded.  Perhaps it is because Vashti tried to take a giant leap all at once--defying the king outright--rather than focusing on what intermediate steps could take her closer to her ultimate goal.  Esther recognized that the battle wouldn't be won with one sweeping victory.  Instead, she had to be patient and take things one step at a time.

This reminds me very much of how recovery is also an incremental, inch-by-inch process.  In a group that I co-lead for parents of people with eating disorders, I often hear mothers and fathers express frustration over what they perceive as their child's "lack of progress."  What good is all the therapy and nutritional counseling if nothing is actually shifting in their child's behaviors?  It's a great question, born of a sincere desire to see positive growth and recovery happen for their loved one.  I usually respond by reminding them that progress is not always apparent to the outsider--a lot of change happens internally before it manifests itself outwardly, and so it's possible for their child to be working really hard without having much to show for it externally.  The slow nature of the recovery process can also be frustrating for the person with the eating disorder, because--let's be honest--who wouldn't want to just snap her fingers and become recovered?  But, as the Purim story teaches us, the surest path is one measured in inches, in which every little step along the way is essential to the creation of the beautiful whole.

This year as we celebrate Purim, I hope all of us can honor the "inches" in our own journeys.  Let's be patient with ourselves as we make small but steady advances toward our goals, whatever they may be!